I continue to be impressed by the number of adult children who are THERE for their parents. We always hear about how the elderly are sitting in retirement homes alone. No visitors and certainly no family members dropping in. While I am not denying that this does occur, today I would like to defend those adult children who ARE visiting and caring for their parents. Many among us are balancing corporate jobs, homework, after school activities and not to mention trying to keep the flame alive with our partner. It seems to happen at the busiest time of our lives...suddenly, our parents really need us.
The most difficult thing to accept is that there is a role reversal that takes place when a parent's health begins to fail. Our strong and powerful Dad is not so strong anymore...and Mom who used to love to entertain the whole family and then some...just can't do it anymore. While we are dealing with the changes in their physical/mental abilities, we long to have good 'ol Dad back and miss the mother/daughter connection we once had. We find ourselves making decisions for them. We delicately prompt and guide them to change their ways, consider a more secure environment and perhaps suggest an adaptive product. Although we know it will benefit them, it is often difficult convincing them. Aging is not for the weak at heart!
I have met many adult children, with tears in their eyes, trying to do what is best for their parents. They are often at a loss and are always overwhelmed by the "new normal". While we cannot stop those we love from aging, I think we can be better at supporting each other during these difficult times. Remember when we used to watch our girlfriend's kids just to give her a break...maybe we should think of ways to lend a hand while she needs time to visit her parents. Better yet, offer to visit her parents with her. She will be forever grateful
